Ask something like, "What's your earliest memory? You'll be able to hold down a conversation for a while by asking questions, as people enjoy talking about themselves. You can really get to know someone by asking a lot of questions. Being a good listener can help people like you more, allowing yourself to be more popular. Try to genuinely listen to what others say.
If you don't understand something, ask a follow up question to make sure you understand. Showing a genuine interest in what others have to say can really help with your popularity. When someone finishes a sentence, wait 5 to 10 seconds to make sure they're truly done speaking. Try to balance talking and listening. Be a helpful person. Another way to be popular is to be helpful to others. Listen when a friend is in need. If someone needs help with a homework problem, offer to lend them a helping hand.
People want to be around people who are caring and kind to other people. Trying to be helpful can help you be more popular. If someone is constantly asking you for favors, it's okay to establish boundaries. Be certain that nobody is using you. If friends are not helpful to you in return, you may be better off with such people out of your life. If someone borrows money from you and they owe you, remind them.
If they don't return the money, tell them off. Be yourself. It's a cliche saying for a reason. Being authentic can help you win friends. While many people feel they have to change to be popular, people tend to be naturally drawn to people who are comfortable in their own skin.
Try to let your personality show through. Do not be afraid to bring up your own interests and passions when the opportunity presents itself. Let your unique qualities, like your sense of humor, shine through during conversations.
Part 4. Trust your instincts. While being popular can be fun, you should never put yourself in a situation that makes you uncomfortable just to please others. If you feel uncomfortable in a situation, listen to this gut instinct. A negative gut reaction often points to a dangerous situation.
Find a way to excuse yourself from a party or even if you get nervous. You can try making up a quick excuse if you do not want to get into a confrontation in the moment.
For example, say something like, "Sorry, but I should get going. I'm coming down with a really bad headache. Do not engage in illegal or immature activity. If you're attending an event where drugs or alcohol are being used, it's best to leave. You do not want to be popular at the expense of your own safety. There also may be legal consequences to underage drinking or the use of illegal drugs. If you're pressured into doing anything illegal, find a way to leave the situation fast.
You can have a trusted friend on call who can help get you out of this situation. Avoid bullying. Negative peer pressure can often encourage you to bully or ostracize other students. Popular cliques in middle or high school often engage in bullying. Remember, bullying can have serious emotional consequences for the target. Avoid the temptation of gossip and do not be openly or even not-openly cruel to other students at your school. If you ever get bullied, go to a website called Stymie to anonymously file a report.
You'll feel better about yourself and you may influence other peers to resist things like bullying and gossip as well. Focus on positive peer pressure. Peer pressure is not always negative. Sometimes, your friends may pressure you into a taking a risk that is worth it. Good friends, for example, will encourage you to submit your poems to that contest or ask your crush on a date.
Friends may also expose you to new and interesting things, like a new music group or author. While rejecting negative peer pressure, focus on the positives.
Allow your friends to teach you about new things and help you find opportunities for fun, learning, and personal growth. My two best friends are going to a different middle school. They tell me to make new friends, but I'm not sure how to. I want to be popular from the start, but, I feel like I'd say the wrong thing. You'll never know if you don't try! Try to identify the potential popular girls from day one and start talking to them. It can't hurt to try, and you won't already have any kind of reputation since you're new there.
Not Helpful 36 Helpful What if you are scared the girls will judge you or not like you and wonder what you're doing here? Look at how the girls treat each other, or how they treat other people who try to hang out with them. If they act mean, they're probably not pleasant people to be with, even to each other. Find a different group of friends instead.
Not Helpful Helpful You cannot force people to like you. However, you can work on being more social, kind, and a better listener. If, at the end of the day, these girls still do not like you, work on strengthening the friendships you have. You can be popular in the sense you have a lot of close friends without necessarily being part of the popular click. The popular kids at my school are always talking in lessons and getting detentions. How can I be one of them if I'm not allowed to get detentions?
You decide what you're comfortable doing, not them. You can still talk to them, but don't let them tell you what to do. I just started hanging out with the "populars" about a week ago and I wanna go back to hanging out with my friends. How do I convince my friends to forgive me? Apologize and admit that you made a mistake.
If they don't accept you back, try calling your closest friend. You might be able to hang out just with the two of you, and gradually earn your way back to the others. If everyone is hanging out in cliques, try to make friends with people sitting next to you in class, or pick a group that looks friendly. Think of a conversation topic you can all talk about, like something that happened at school. They can dare to try, take a chance and risk like children.
These tries and failures are called experience. Same goes to popular people. They get experience, no matter positive or negative one, and it makes them stronger, happier and more successful than other people.
Therefore, they become the center of attention. Popularity is all about well developed social skills. Furthermore, popular people are completely different. They have different jobs, level of education, life principles, and they belong to different layers of society. Nobleness is a rarity these days. Feel free to help people in need. She's just outgoing and extroverted and loves being around a lot of people. It's always seemed kind of silly to me to think of there being discrimination against popular people.
They're popular. The ones who are treated unfairly are those who aren't popular, right? But that's not the case. Of course it's wrong for a popular child to pick on an unpopular child because she's not wearing the latest style of clothing or because he's not interested in sports. But isn't it just as wrong for the unpopular kids to gossip about a popular girl and to assume that she's shallow and superficial just because she's conventionally pretty and makes friends easily?
Honestly, I'm ashamed to admit that I never thought about this before I had a popular child of my own. I now realize that my inability to understand that all people, regardless of their degree of popularity, deserve to be judged on their character, indicates a lack of empathy on my part.
I also need to come to terms with my biases because I want to completely avoid making Wendy feel in any way bad for who she is. This distinction — between status and likability — is especially important in understanding the alpha girl over her teenage-boy counterpart. Alpha boys tend to be aggressive in physical ways, starting fights or pushing each other around, while alpha girls are more likely to act in relationally aggressive ways, spreading rumors or using the silent treatment.
But the behaviors can be interchangeable; sometimes the guys gossip, and the girls fight. The most critical difference in how alpha-like traits manifest in men and women, research suggests, is how the other students react to those acts of aggression. But that is so not the case for girls. The correlation between likability and status approaches zero for girls. Some alpha girls are born that way.
But others teach themselves how to become alphas, learning social skills from watching adults, or from their own experiences at a young age. But perhaps more importantly, the reason alpha girls have such a hold over their peers may be at least partially explained by the neurological growth teenagers are experiencing.
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